Inadequate / Incapable

After reading blog after blog on TTC it start to worry me that maybe we're trying to soon. Maybe we should wait, maybe we can't even have kids, maybe we'll have issues getting pregnant. When I think that maybe we'll have issues and it might take us years, then I worry about waiting to have a baby. I think we would make excellent parents. We don't have a 100% perfect marriage, but who honestly does?

Then there is the money topic! Don't even get me started on that. That's a whole other bag of worries for me. I'm always keeping tabs on our finances, as of lately at least. I know I have been a slacker the past month or so. But I'm kicking my butt in gear and going to make sure we start saving for our future. We've already started, earlier this month, but we still spend too much money on other things. Like, going out to eat, for example. I don't even want to tell you how much we spent on restaurants and fast food this month. It's outrageous. I can tell right now that that will be changing! We have plenty of food at home, I don't know why we insist on going out to eat.

This weekend we plan on setting up a budget for ourselves and the extra things we spend money on. i.e. hobbies, going out to eat, dates, etc. It's going to be a lot easier to do this once we get our floors done and a new couch bought. Because we will have that on one card and we will also be transferring our other cards balance to that card too. Once that's taken care of we can get that paid off. And other than the house and car we will be debt free. Then we can start working on making additional payments on our car to speed up the process. We would like to save up for a used car too. Nothing fancy, just something to get from point A to point B. The annoying part in the whole scenario is waiting for the credit card that we need to use to pay for the couch and floors. *sigh*

I'm just so stressed with this whole home improvement process. It should be fun, but Rob never wants to do work around the house. We still haven't torn up anymore carpet other than the carpet in the living room/entryway. That's another one of our big goals this weekend (hopefully). I want to get most of the furniture that we don't use moved into the kitchen. Then I want to rip up the carpet. I know I should just "Relax" like my tattoo says, but it's just been so hard for me lately. I've got a lot going on in my head.

OH! And another big thing that we have to do this weekend is paint the wall where we drywalled over the fireplace. We haven't even bought the paint or supplies yet! It's just so frustrating! I just need to RELAX. I'm going to start working on that now.

Fertility Books

Monday night I ordered some books that I had read about on Baby Makin(g) Machine's blog and I also got a coupon for them when I purchased a First Response Fertility Test a few months ago. It turns out I couldn't use that test at the time I bought it because I was on the pill and you have to be off all hormones for at least two months. I'll be able to test it out soon, if I'm not with-spawn by the time two months comes around. If I do get a chance to use it, then I'll definitely post about it.

Onto the books though... I purchased Fertility Facts: Hundreds of Tips for Getting Pregnant and The Fertility Journal: A Day-by-Day Guide. I cannot tell you how excited I am to get these and start reading them. I used the 7-10 day shipping, mainly because it was free. Now I must put my patience to the test while I wait for my books to show up in my mail box. While I wait though, I'll be reading as much as I can. I really wish I had more mothers to talk to about their experiences. There are plenty of women at my work place, but I'm not very close to many of them and I don't want to make the suspicious, since I'm not ready to spread the news.

So, lately I've been really addicted to reading Baby Makin(g) Machine's blog. I read it on the way home from work on my iPhone and I read it when I'm at home watching television. But she's making me slightly crazy! I'm a really indecisive person, and apparently she is too. So as I'm reading through her blog, she changes her mind constantly on when her and her husband should have a baby so that's changing my mind on if Rob and I should really start trying now. We're not in the best financial situation and our house is in disarray. But both of us really feel in our hearts that we're ready. If we did get pregnant next month then that leaves us nine months of preparing and fixing up the things in the house. We'll see how it goes though.

BMM has a 'Baby Bucket List' of the things she'd like to do before and during pregnancy. I'd really like to start one of my own. The main thing I want to do is get our house in order. I would ideally like to get my body in tip top shape before pregnancy. But I'll save the list for another blog posting.

Birth Control

Last week Rob and I made a big decision. We decided that I should stop taking my birth control. I'm not sure if we're completely 100% ready for everything that comes along with a baby, but I do know that we're ready to try. I think for right now we're not going to actively try to get pregnant, but if it happens then we're not going to be upset about it.

It's hard to not feel the baby fever right now. My co-worker/friend (Valissa) has a six month old. My brother and his wife have a one month old. There are two other girls at my work that are pregnant, and one is about to pop any moment. I've just had that feeling lately that I want to be a mother. It's the strangest thing for me, I've never felt anything like it.

Our ideal situation to start trying would be when I was able to stay at home full time with a little one, but we're not sure when that's going to be. Probably not for a few years, and neither of us wants to wait that long. When the time comes Valissa and I plan on talking to our HR and seeing if she would consider us working part time from home and part time in the office. Our jobs can almost be fully done at home. That would be wonderful if we could do that, but if not then I'm not sure what we would do.

I'm thinking about getting some pregnancy and ovulation tests just to have on hand. Nanette ("sister-in-law") told me about this website that she found, As it stands right now, I'm not sure exactly when I ovulate since my birth control was giving me an artificial period. I don't know what my "regular" period is going to do without the help of the pill and the ovulation tests should help me figure that out.

I'm thinking that I might start making this blog geared towards our journey, or I might make a new one. I'm not sure yet. I'll do some thinking.

Baby Making

You know what, I really don't like the odds of making a baby. When you ovulate your egg is only good for up to 12-24 hours! That's crap! That means you only have one day a month to really try to get pregnant.

How in the world do people do it? That just stresses me out so much more. I really need to stop worrying so much, that's not good for anyone!

On the plus side, I get my Relax tattoo this weekend!

Update: "Fireplace"

The man (Frank) that is drywalling our fireplace shut came out to work on it today. He got quite a bit done. I think tomorrow he might finish, but I'm not positive. Once he's done all we'll have left to do is buy the floor board to match and then paint it!

I am so excited to announce that we picked out what our new flooring is going to look like! We had a sales representative from French Quarter Flooring's come out last night and give us an estimate. We decided to go with laminate flooring as opposed to tile. We're going to go with the one on top in the picture below; the more red one. It looks really nice! I cannot wait until we get it put in. We're not sure when that's going to be though. Soon, I hope! :)

And since we put a deposit down on the flooring we got this really awesome rug! It's really nice, and quite large. My parents both really like it, they offered to buy it from us! Ha!

Last Weekend

Just a note: Last night I was trying to update from my phone, then it DIED! :(

Well, last weekend wasn't anything exciting. But we did get the carpet in our living room and entry way torn up. And I spent a lot of time hanging out at home because Saturday Rob went to lunch with his friend Tim and Sunday he had some meeting thing to go to. On Saturday morning my dad came over and we loaded up his trailer with all the carpet and foam and also the rock and mortar from the fireplace.

After work is going to be busy for us. My dad's friend Frank is coming out to look at the hole in our wall where the fireplace was. He's going to tell us how much it's going to be to fix it and then hopefully start working on it tomorrow. Then around 6:30-7:00 this flooring company is going to come out and take some measurements and show us some samples. Then hopefully give us an estimate so we know how much we're going to need to save. I'm excited, but nervous. I know it's going to cost us a lot of money and I'm not very patient. Why can't things be free?!

So on Monday I typed myself out a meal plan and then after work Rob and I went to the grocery store. It's been working really good so far. I've been switching up my snacks which helps with variety. Last night I made my Grandma's Tuna Noodle Casserole and it was freakin' delicious! The first time Rob had it, he didn't like it. But this time he actually liked it. So that made me happy!

I should probably start working.
And Terra, I promise I'll get better at updating!


This was supposed to say something about Rob and I ripping up the carpet and all that fun stuff, but for some reason my phone didn't want to let me type in this section. I don't have much to write about my carpet right now, other than we're planning on starting the process of ripping it up tonight when we both get home. I couldn't be more excited about that because I'm tired of having it in my dang house!

When It Happens

I finished this book yesterday. It was so cute! I love love love how Tobey and Sara are together when they finally get together. It's pretty much everybody's ideal relationship. They just get eachother and it's amazing. It's a nice simpe read since it's a teen literature book, but that doesn't change the fact that I really enjoyed it.

Happy 2 Year (dating) Anniversary!
& 3 Month (married) Anniversary!

It is so hard for me to believe that Rob and I have been together for two years! If feels like I've known him forever, but at the same time it feels like we just starting dating! Before I couldn't believe we were even dating, now I can't believe we're married. It's just so weird to think about. And what's even more weird is us thinking about expanding our family. Definitely weird in a good way. I just can't believe how great my life has turned out so far. I am definitely grateful that I've met such an amazing man so early on in my life.

I know that since we're married now, we're not supposed to count our dating anniversary. But this is a large milestone that I want to acknowledge. We've planned to go to dinner tonight. I can't wait! I love my Husband more and more everyday! <3 (not to say that he doesn't drive me crazy most of the time!) :)


I am officially in love with my phone. It has everything that I'll ever need on it. Except a Blogger application which is lame, but I can always go directly on the internet to update if I need to. I went to see my nephew this weekend. He's an adorable baby. I didn't hold him though because I was kind of scared. He just looks so breakable. But I think we're going over next Saturday so I'll definitely hold him them. He definitely makes me want one now. But I know we can't. :(

Update: Fireplace

This is it before:
This is the fireplace now: We have decided now that we're going to take everything out of it and close it up completely. The black section and bricks aren't being held in my anything. We can just pull them right out. So we're going to pull all that out and drywall it shut then paint it to match the rest of the living room. Which I think is so freakin' exciting because that's what I wanted to do in the first place, but Rob wasn't really havin' that, but now he's perfectly fine with it. We've also talked to a guy Rob knows who will do tile cheaper then this guy quotes us today. He told us that it would be $3.50 a square foot! When he told us that, Rob and I thought he was joking! But I really hope we get at least the living room tiled soon! We got our entertainment center today! It's in boxes, but we still got it! Let me remind you want it looks like.


I've decided I would like to get the word Relax tattooed on me. I'm a worry wart and sometimes, I just need to relax. This will probably be my next one, besides getting my flowers fixed. I just got to work on placement. Any ideas?

So, tonight we're going to Home Depot with the guys that's going to work on our fireplace. He's going to help us pick out tile, grout and whatever else we need to make this happen. Then bright and early tomorrow he's going to start working on our fireplace. Tonight we should probably start clearing the area around the fireplace so he has a place to work. And I definitely need to clean off the mantle, that would be a smart idea.

I really need to clean my house. Ever since this sun burn I haven't wanted to do ANYTHING around my house. So stuff is just piling up. I haven't folded my clothes that I washed on Sunday! And I generally love folding clothes. Well, this weekend I will be a slacker no more. I have a goal and I'm going to acheive it:

Well, I'm at work so, I should probably... work. :(

Grayson Caine Gill

Favorite picture of my brother and his new baby boy.

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